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[personal profile] elohvee
broken up and dances.
Supernatural. Sam/Dean, R. Post-pilot ficlet. Warnings for incest and angst. 300 words. Title from Jim Morrison.


For a few months, Sam drives faster than Dean does. He's angry at the road, at the car, at the sun in his eyes and the rain on the windshield. They spar in empty fields or parks, once a playground at midnight. Sometimes, squinting up at Sam from where he's lying in the dirt, Dean's not entirely sure it's just practice.

Less than a week after they leave Palo Alto, Sam crawls into Dean's bed, pinning him to the mattress. He opens his mouth to Dean's throat and bites down on his brother's shoulder, and he doesn't use nearly enough lube. He moves in Dean, over Dean, jerks his brother off too hard and too fast, and it's not like it used to be.

They used to fit together smooth and clean, like gears turning or puzzle pieces fitting into place. Maybe they've both just gotten harder, rougher. They clash and jar and come out of it with bruised skin and aching bones, but calmer. Sated. It's something, at least.

Sam doesn't ask for permission, not like he used to, stopping at every movement to ask, is this okay? And this? while Dean twisted and groaned under him: begging, wanting. But Dean doesn't say anything, not even when Sam drops his forehead to between his brother's shoulders and cries, digging his nails into Dean's arm only to hurt and hang on.

He kisses Sam's forehead when they're done, and he stays in his own bed when Sam moves away. It'll just take time, he thinks. The grief will pass, fade, and then he'll have Sammy back the way he was before. Before all this. The ache will dull, and when that happens, they'll fit again. The road will smooth out, and they'll slide into place along it.

Somehow. Someday. Soon.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 08:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jdsampson.livejournal.com
Very nice - a perfect description of how I see Sam in those first few weeks..

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 08:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 09:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ixchel55.livejournal.com
Painfully wonderful.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 10:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 09:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bluesister.livejournal.com
Lovely. The metaphor of gears is great, now more roughly shaped so they barely work together. *applause*

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 10:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
And they also have to work together, no matter how brokenly, because considering their day job, it would be just too easy for an uncooperative moment to land one or both of them on the wrong side of a coffin lid.

Thank you! *curtsies*

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 09:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cloex-brosluvr.livejournal.com
oohh I loved how they don't fit together yet after being gone from each other.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 10:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 10:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] itsthewa.livejournal.com
Ouch! Oh MAN that hurt really good.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-15 10:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
I keep promising myself I'll write happy Wincest someday, and it never happens. Perhaps for the best.

Thank you!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 12:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 1shotjunkie.livejournal.com
Lovely - a perfect description of the rougher sides of the boys relationship, especially after Jess' death. =D Bravo!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 12:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you! :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 01:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kitsune-red.livejournal.com
I like. :)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 02:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 02:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/__rini/
I love this, especially the metaphor of gears. I don't know, it just really seemed to fit.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 02:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
I'm glad you enjoyed it; thank you!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 03:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glamorous-nymph.livejournal.com
OH that was just. right.

The road will smooth out, they fitted together like gears turning...

All of it, perfect.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 04:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you so much!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 04:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] la-folle-allure.livejournal.com
*is dead* I LOVE THIS DRABBLE!

Now, if I can only get you to add all the others ones together into a super long MEGA drabble of LOVE. aka a FIC. *clings*

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 04:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Oh, god, but I have WORK to do and and and WHY DO THE FIC IDEAS ALWAYS COME AT THE MOST INCONVENIENT TIMES??

"Oh, I'm so sorry, sir, I just couldn't do my homework. I was too busy writing incestuous gay porn."

*facedesk*

*hugs you tight and loves you anyway*

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 04:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] merepersiflage.livejournal.com
Awesome. All the imagery came together beautifully.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 04:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 06:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zenamydog.livejournal.com
wow very powerful piece. Great job!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 07:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anakin415.livejournal.com
painfully perfect

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 10:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] felisblanco.livejournal.com
That hurt in all the right places. So good.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 06:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dawnie1970.livejournal.com
Oh, man, that was intense, so beautiful.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 11:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 08:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] euraylie.livejournal.com
Oooh very, very nice. I could almost taste it..if that makes any sense.
I love long involved fics, but I also adore these short, cut to the bone pieces.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-16 11:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
It does make sense; thank you! :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-17 06:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aimless-words.livejournal.com
I'm always impressed with writers who can get across so much in so few words. Very nicely done :)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-17 06:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-20 04:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bm1893.livejournal.com
I don't know what made me feel worse: that Sam treats Dean with something less than tenderness or that Dean seems to be hanging onto a false hope.

How you managed to fit that much conflict into 300 words is beyond me. Thank you.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-08-20 10:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
As far as I can tell, it comes down to the fact that Dean really will give Sam anything, will do anything for him, and Sam either doesn't realize in his grief how much he really does own Dean, or he just doesn't care. I'd like to think it's not the latter. *huggles poor angsty Winchesters*

Thank you. :O)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-10-25 08:58 am (UTC)
ext_8208: (Default)
From: [identity profile] merihn.livejournal.com
Awww...
Harsh... poor Sam and Dean.
i love them so much... but they have such problems!
Awesomeness.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-10-26 01:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wheebubbles.livejournal.com
Thank you! ♥

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